


Never More Than You

by livingwithmermaids



Series: Hinting At Something Different [211]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean Loves Sam, Dean is hopelessly in love, Episode: s06e21 Let It Bleed, M/M, Sad Dean, Smell kink kind of not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-09
Updated: 2015-09-09
Packaged: 2018-04-19 20:53:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4760651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livingwithmermaids/pseuds/livingwithmermaids
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He wanted to love her, he really did, but he knew he would never love another person more than Sam.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never More Than You

**Author's Note:**

> Season 6 episode 21 Let it Bleed

Dean knew that he never really loved Lisa.

He wanted to, he really did. He wanted to love someone unconditionally who wasn't Sam. He wanted to settle down with a significant other in a house with a kid and a  _yard._ But the longer he stayed with Lisa and Ben, the more empty and alone he felt. He just kept thinking about he and Sam living in a house, he and Sam having a son, Sam mowing the lawn while Dean watched from the window.

When he thought back on why he made himself more and more miserable by staying with Lisa, he realized it was because sometimes, she could be so much like Sam. She would scold him about his eating habits. She would speak in a soft, sweet tone when he went into periods of depression, just like Sam used to do. Lisa was a surrogate for Sam.

It was fair to her, not at all, but he couldn't help it. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't make the ache in his stomach go away unless he thought about Sam. He wanted to make the pain go away, and pretending Lisa was his brother seemed to make it lessen, just a little bit.

He's pretty sure Lisa started to catch on a few weeks before Sam back. He'd kept his brother's bag under their bed, and sometimes when he felt like he was going to pass out because he missed Sam so much, he would take out one of Sam's shirts, hold it against his chest, and just breathe. Once, he'd accidentally left a shirt on the bed in his hurry to get to work on time. When he'd got back, it was gone and in it's place was a sadly smiling Lisa.

He wanted to love her, he really did, but he knew he would never love another person more than Sam.


End file.
